Sometimes the reality is better than the dream. To stand up on stage with all the other winners of this year’s Venus Adult Industry Award, holding my big, fat heavy trophy high and my head even higher, singing along to “We are the champions!” is such a perfect moment frozen in time. It meant the world to me to be recognised by the progressive and open-minded elements of the adult industry with an award – even though or maybe because my films break all the mainstream rules. I was honoured for my work as a director by the Special Jury Prize for “Pioneering Achievements in Porn for Women” – a category that was created especially for me.
For five years I have been creating porn from a female perspective and fought long and hard to get distribution and make sure that female fantasies will be seen and understood. Walt Disney once said “If you can dream it, you can do it!”. And he was right. You can and must make your dreams come true – even if it feels like banging your head against a brick wall. It can feel like shedding a skin to follow a dream and I am glad to have progressed from being against any porn to creating alternative porn.
I want to take this opportunity to thank all the wonderful women and men that support and inspire me and my work. I am thinking of my performers who have all become close friends, especially Violetta and Belle (who was in Berlin with me when we received the award). Without the fearless performers – the liberated women and supportive men who dare to explore erotic pleasures beyond the usual porn stereotypes – my films would not exist. I am also thinking of my babe, Tony who is tirelessly working behind the scenes, shooting the behind the scenes footage, building my websites and picking me up when I am down. A heartfelt ‘thank you’ also to Cynthia, a wonderful woman who I have never met in person but who supports and inspires me with frequent emails and calls. A very warm ‘danke’ and ‘thank you’ also to the wonderful Laura Meritt from Sexklusiviateten in Berlin – she was one of the first female sex shop owners to sell my films. I want to share my award with all the wonderful women and men who have supported me by purchasing my film and putting their money where their mouth is. A big ‘cheers’ to all the wonderful creatures that have shared their fantasies with me and honoured me with their trust.
When Belle and I danced together through the Brandenburger Gate at 4 a.m., we were thinking of you!