The Age Of Unreason – Ageism in porn and beyond

I recently came across an online post with the title “9 Adult Entertainers Who Should Have Left The Industry Ages Ago”. The article slagged off mainly female performers in their fifties, amongst them such icons as Nina Hartley with the words “Its time for her to go; her breast-implants are older than many actresses in the industry” Ha ha.

The cult around “perfect”, young and surgically enhanced bodies is everywhere – from reality TV to porn – the media world is terrified by ageing and maturity, especially in women. If older women are featured at all in the media and porn, then it is usually in a derogatory manner. Hence, if women in porn are dirty slags and fucking cunts then women over 50 are dirty OLD slags and Fucking OLD cunts. They are the lowest of the low, not even worth to be looked at, doormats to be ridiculed and jizzed on.
It is as if women over fifty are meant to be invisible and asexual. Whereas mature men are considered to be attractive and desirable and stay in their TV presenter jobs, mature women are replaced with younger models.

I am pissed off at this and hate the way mature women are represented in the media, and especially in porn. This is why I decided to shoot a beautiful porn film with the stunning and sexy 57 year old Dutch sex educator Cora Emens in the lead role. I wanted to shoot a scene that was true to Cora’s desires and lust and celebrates her sexuality, removed from the clichés surrounding “older women” (from MILFS to dirty old bags). The shoot was amazing, her scene is beautiful and is one of the key scenes of my new feature (S)he Comes. Seeing it premiere on the big screen in the Movimento cinema Berlin as part of the Pornfilmfest made us immensely proud of our co-operation. Cora and I sat in the cinema holding hands and beaming as her super-sensual and passionate scene oozed confidence and sex appeal, and was rewarded with spontaneous audience applause.

We created this film because we wanted to fly the flag for women to be themselves and live their sexuality out freely, no matter how old they are, no matter if they have a wrinkle or two. We want to inspire women to love themselves and enjoy their sexuality. We believe that sexiness is related to confidence and the ability to let go rather than to a taut and “perfect” body and a rigid mind, desperate to please someone else rather than just being – in the moment and yourself.

We were hoping that this message would spill out of the cinema and seep into the mainstream media, reaching as many women as possible. I had been in touch with a women’s TV show on a German public broadcaster and a talk show, and hoped Cora and I could both spread the message.

But after an initial enthusiasm from the women’s slot, I was informed that they liked my idea to do a documentary about women’s sexuality over 50 and will shoot this film but they did not want to include me, Cora or porn in it. Sex for women over 50? Maybe. A 57 year old woman living her fantasies out freely in an alternative porn film – no way!

The talk show did not invite Cora as a guest either and any interview Cora and I did for the print media made sure they removed all elements relating to “age”. Cora made the amazing statement “I will have sex until the day I die” and not even this headline-worthy quote made it into any article. (Keep an eye on my upcoming blogs, I will publish Cora’s interview in full on here shortly).

Today, Madonna made the front page of various UK tabloids calling her “shameless” and “shocking” for taking topless pictures for the magazine Interview.

Shocking and shameless can become sick or disgusting when a woman over sixty dares to express her sexuality: Recently former 68-year old former politician and MP Edwina Currie was ridiculed on the UK version of I’m a celebrity, get me out of here for her flirtation with the lads and open talk about one-night stands, vibrators and her continuing strong sex drive. It made her co-celebrities and the presenters feel “sick”, whereas 28 year-old Kendra Wilkinson talking about her nights with Hugh Hefner (70 years her senior) and multiple sex tapes made no-one (except Edwina) bat an eyelid.

Wake up, people. As Morgana Muses, a 50 year old Australian porn director, featuring in her own films says to her audiences: “Right now I am fifty and one day you will be fifty and over as well, so why not embrace your (sexual) future?” No cosmetic procedures in the world can truly stop or revert the physical signs of ageing. We can, though, change the way we think and feel about confidence, beauty and sex at 50 and beyond and celebrate what it means to be human.

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